The statue of limitationsUpdated: May 8th, 2007
It’s not often I’ll devote a whole story to something that happened at another club, but the Southampton sculpture fiasco is just too compelling a tale to ignore.
In case you missed it, a bronze statue of Southampton legend Ted Bates was unveiled outside St Mary’s stadium last weekend. To the horror of fans the £112,000 statue depicted a midget-like figure with an uncanny resemblance to former Portsmouth chairman Milan Mandaric.
Click on image to see photos of other football statues
Supporters immediately condemned the work, with readers at the Daily Echo describing it as “shrek in a suit” and “an affable Oompa-Loompa carrying a Malteser”. The BBC say the club might now tear it down, members of the Trust which commissioned it “have not been able to sleep or eat”, while sculptor Ian Brennan describes being “mentally shattered” and even offered to add five inches to the legs free of charge.
To quote Oscar Wilde, you would need a heart of stone not to laugh.
But the tragedy is that all of this is the product of two years’ hard work from the dedicated fans who formed the Ted Bates Trust in 2005. It raised £50,000 from supporters while the remainder was put in by the club and former chairman Rupert Lowe.
The root of the problem appears to be that Ian Brennan, the distinguished sculptor the Trust commissioned, specialises in wood carvings of animals and had never made a bronze statue of a person before.
The comments of Trust chairman Dave Ford days before the unveiling probably didn’t help matters either:
“It is very rare I am lost for words but I saw the statue last week and it is awesome - a tremendous tribute to a great man. Fans have waited a long time for this and it is going to be fantastic. I really believe it will be the best football statue anywhere both in size and the amount of detail.”
I suppose there are two morals to this tale. Not only do the best intentions in the world mean nothing if you have poor judgement, but failing to consult the fans can have disasterous results.
~ The story also made me wonder who we would immortalise if we were given the option. I suppose Colin Bell would be the most obvious choice, though maybe a solid gold statue of Malcolm Allison - sipping champagne and waving a large cheque - would be a more fitting reminder of this club’s history.